… She stepped on the accelerator and sped down the dark and lonely roads, as though trying to get away as far as she could. She knew well that that was only a means of escape, but the truth was far harder than she could handle – at that moment precisely. She was nervous; her hands shaking as she shifted the gear, and her heart still beating like thunder in her bosom. She felt like it was going to explode; she tried to distract herself with the scenery, but at the speed she was going, it was an almost impossible task to accomplish.
Quickly, she reached for the radio, hoping the music would take her away – somewhere calm, far away from the storm raging within. “I’m scared, so afraid to show I care; will he think me weak if I tremble when I speak… I’ve been there, with my heart out in my hand…” More confusion consumed her and the urge to just disappear. She was aware of the circumstances, and understood them well, but the feelings she buried deep within were struggling to resurface. It was inevitable; the decision had to be made.
Unknowingly, she found her fingers reaching for her lips, still numb and tingly. She gave away a shy smile unwittingly, but quickly realized the foolish gesture and was able to suppress it. Yet she was unable to control the images of that fracture of a second, one she had longed for. She knew, right there and then, that all she wanted was to relive that moment over and over again, till she was satiated.
The car finally came to a complete halt; she took a look in the front mirror and knew that the time had come. She wiped off the faint trace of a smile, erased that recollection from her mind and steadily walked home; well aware that that would be the one last time… never to reminisce again.